Choosing a location for your first date is an important decision. A first date is already nerve wracking enough, even if you’re a guy who likes to socialize and dates frequently. It puts a lot of pressure on you to pick an activity that will allow the chemistry between you and a woman to emerge naturally, and hopefully end the night with some action. In a city as large as Ottawa, there are lots of things to do and tons of places to choose from for on a first date. The thing is, you have to take into account what the most important parts of meeting someone from one of these personal classified sites for the first time are: the ability to have a conversation, focus on each other, and not put both of you into an awkward situation where escape isn’t easy if things don’t go according to plan. Of all the things out there you can choose to do, though, here are at least a few missteps we’ve experienced that have turned any sexual chemistry into a DOA date. Let us tell you about our mistakes so you can avoid making the same ones.
This is where you meet women, not take them. A nightclub can seem like a good idea in theory. There’s alcohol, which is always good for lowering social inhibitions, and it’s supposed to be a festive, fun atmosphere. The problem is that you probably won’t have any chance to talk to the woman you’re with, since it’s loud, and clubs can also inspire a little too much drinking. And trust us; you don’t want to be bringing home some drunken woman for sex. Not only are there legal issues of consent, but also, it’s going to be a sloppy mess. Nightclubs should be on the bottom of your list (if on the list at all) of places to take your date. The other thing is that you have to dance. It’s just an unwritten rule that if you’ve consciously chosen to take a woman somewhere that the primary activity is dancing, that’s what you’re going to do. Unless you’re a great dancer and don’t want to talk to her all night – which is a possibility, if you’re a club guy – avoid taking your date to a nightclub, at least the first time.
A Friend’s Party
A friend’s party might seem like a good idea, especially if you’re not sure who else is going that you know. A low key situation is usually a good atmosphere for a first date, since there’s no pressure. However, problems can immediately arise. For example, if you met the woman you’re taking out on personal classified sites like this one, things might get a little strained if people start asking how you met or know each other. Obviously, you don’t want to put a complete stranger into an awkward situation where she’s surrounded by people she doesn’t know at an event hosted by your friends. Not only does that totally kill any chemistry you may have had with each other, but even worse, if there wasn’t any chemistry to begin with, it further exacerbates the painful time spent together. When you take a woman out to dinner on a traditional, stereotypical date, if things aren’t going well, you pay the bill and part ways. That’s it. End of story. No epilogue. However, if you’re in a situation like a friend’s party, it’s not so simple. Just avoid doing anything personal with family and friends for first dates, because it will get so awkward so fast that whether you had chemistry to begin with or not will be a moot point at the end of the night.
Destinations of Distance
This is the same principle of getting yourself stuck in a situation you can’t get out of if things aren’t going well. If you’re interested in a woman – whether you’ve meet her in person or not – you want to make a good enough impression to seduce her into your bed. For example, maybe you meet a woman who has extremely particular interests, so you try to be creative as you plan a first date. Maybe she’s into museums, so you plan to take her to a major museum that’s a two hour train ride away. That sounds like a good idea, right? Two hours isn’t that long. Oh, but it is. Two hours is a long time to spend with someone that you met on a personal classified site and who you have absolutely no chemistry with, and trust us, with each passing minute, it will only become increasingly painful. Keep it local for the first date, and then decide whether you want to spend two hours on a train ride with the woman.
Your Own Home
Bringing someone into your own home should never be a casual thing, especially if you’ve never met them before. It’s one thing to even bring a one night stand back to your place, but hey, at least you’ve met her for a night and you’ve had a chance to feel her out. However, to blindly invite a stranger to your home is a bad idea, especially if things go wrong. For a first date, you might think it’s a good idea, for example, to cook a meal. Wrong. First of all, this is far too much effort to put into a first date that might end up being a disaster anyway. Second, what if she’s a raving psycho, and she decides she likes you? The other thing is that you can’t leave if things aren’t working. It’s your house, so you have to somehow strategically get her to leave. That gets really awkward, really quickly, especially if she’s not taking the hint. Sometimes, women have the uncanny quality of feeling exactly the opposite of how you are – you think the date is a disaster and you’re bored out of your mind; she’s having a great time and thinks you’re amazing. Keep first dates outside the walls of your own home, at least at the beginning. If a first date goes well and you’ve had a chance to size her up, then you can choose whether to go back to your place and get down to business, but give it at least a few hours.
Cultural Snoozing (Unless There’s Boozing)
Taking first dates to cultural places like museums or galleries can be a great way to seduce a woman that you met on personal classified sites. It will be a great place if this Canadian woman is into art or has refined tastes. It reveals your sophistication and taste, and also works as a social lubricant if there’s an opening and wine’s involved. Back up, and review what we just said, though: wine. The difference between taking a woman on a date to a cultural destination that’s fun, as opposed to boring, is determined by what you’re doing there. If you invite a Canadian woman from personal classified sites to a gallery talk, for example, unless she’s really into academia, it’s not going to win you points. You can’t talk to each other, and cultural discussions are usually really dry. While this works for a very select few women, it’s not exactly a fail proof strategy. On the other hand, what can be fun for both of you is going to an opening, having a few drinks, and looking at some art. Openings are the best because you also get to talk to each other, whereas a regular museum visit usually requires indoor, quiet voices, making conversation awkward and stilted. Stick with the openings or gallery walk nights, and you’ll be good.